Since times began I have always struggled with my fitness and how I feel about myself. But...Don't we all??
What better way but to take you through my journey on how I got here?!
Grab a cuppa, blanket and let me take you through my last few years.
10 years ago I started with horrific back pain, not a "oooooo that hurt" as you bend over to pick up a sock, but more of a, oh my god, I actually cannot move, type of pain. I lived at home at the time, and I had to shout for my parents as I could not get out of bed. I couldnt move. I was so scared. The pain felt like it was in my kidneys, my legs were tingling, for a 24 year old at the time, (yes I'm now 35!) it was a frightening time. Over time, with paid physio, which was useless, and then finding a fantastic chiropractor, I was finally diagnosed with spondylosis, confirmed by MRI and hospital. I was then under instruction and advised to never actually run, that the impact could cause more damage to the rest of my discs that are now under added pressure. Hurrah!! some may shout, being told medically you can't actually run, and don't get me wrong, I have used this on more than one occasion, but deep down, i'm thinking, I can't actually run anymore. To be then limited to what I can actually do and allow myself to do, that I struggled to find the balance of standing, sitting, walking without it hurting and causing flare ups. Feeling like I was stuck in the wrong body. When I was younger I used to be so active, used to ride horses, climb indoor and out, ice skate, just liked being active. Not anymore! Those days were gone.
I have managed over the years to find the balance and become more in tune with my body listening to it and understanding it. I was then able to start again slowly and start to do some exercise. Some light weights and walking, ready for when we were then planning our wedding I was able to lost quite a but of weight.
The weight found me a few years later...
I was able to find an exercise programme online, and I did a home workout programme and lost 14lb in 21 days and I felt great. I felt stronger and more in control. Again after a while, the weight went back on.
2017, my body decided that giving me a knackered back, wasn't the only challenge it was going to give me. It decided it was going to grace me with an incredibly painful right hip! I was gutted. I felt like I had lost control of what was going on. They the things I liked to do, were getting further and further away from me. It was hard times. The pain was unbearable. Feeling like i was dragging my leg because it hurt to lift my hip, and then it was hurting my back. And all I can keep thinking is, at the time, I'm 34!! I shouldn't be having these problems.
12 months ago was the pinnacle turn in my life for all of these problems for me. I was back to being my heaviest weight and it was tough. I was really down, sick of being in pain, and quite frankly I had had enough of it. My chiropractor helped me so much throughout everything. I went back to my GP and got a referral back to the hospital as my chiropractor had written to my GP.
After a horrendous ordeal with the NHS, I paid private twice to see 2 consultations and along with a very painful contrast MRI, I was finally diagnosed with a labrum tear in my right hip! There keeps being talks about if I have an impingement too but thats never been agreed upon.
It felt a relief to have an answer. To now understand what the issue was with my hip, and its not connected to my back, but it gives me a good platform to now try and do something. In May I had a steroid injection into my hip, most painful thing ever! Do not recommend one bit, just saying. It took me a while, longer than we all expected to recover from this, but finally it settled. I decided to try a few things out and I was now determined not to let anything else get me down or feel like I was losing the will. There is the potential that at some point, maybe in the near future I may need surgery. The motivation kicked in to get myself physically and mentally ready for if/when that day comes, to aid a better, quicker recover time.
I started the 21 day programme again at home, to start small, 21 workouts at home, with some weights and resistance bands, and it went well. There were a few days that I could feel my body firing off warning shots and thats when I really needed to listen to it. I completed the programme and then moved onto a bigger challenge, an 80 day one! Again an at home workout programme, but for 80 days, 6 days out of 7. This was absolute murder, but on 21st September 2019 I completed it! I felt so so proud of myself. I cried, lots. I had lost 17lb and a total of 22.5 inches from around my body. I took a picture nearly everyday and documented my fitness journey on insta. I wasn't ashamed of my ups and downs and it became more of a , this is me, this is who I am, its not pretty, but i'm working my ass off to get to where I need to be. During the summer I joined a gym and did some of my workouts at the gym. Started to incorporate the gym equipment into my routine, still no running!!
Until now! I am stronger, I am fitter, I am me!
Catch ya laters!